I keep finding myself wanting to press “command /” to comment out a part of an essay, or some thought I had, to save it for later. I have spent so much of my life actively avoiding learning how to program, it has been an interesting experience, finally getting into it. When working on a project, it feels like there is always some part of my mind trying to process what is happening in the code I am working, even when I am doing something else. In this way it has really become an interesting part of my life, that I never thought it would.
I feel Like I have improved my coding skills significantly, but with every weekly project, I feel like I end up kicking my own ass. Just one little conceptual misunderstanding can throw me off and send me into a downward spiral of confusion for hours. It is like trying to fly a plane without knowing what all the buttons do.
In that way, I really hate how limited i feel. It was much easier for me to conceptually understand physical things at the beginning of the semester, like circuitry and mechanical systems. Sometimes when I rely on just programming, I feel like I am sliding backwards down a slide, and end up feeling stupider than the day before.
I really want to keep improving my skills, but it is hard on my conscience and confidence to always be working just above the range of my ability.
Still, I am fascinated by computing. I wouldn’t keep working so hard at leaning it if I wasn’t. It helps me to see the world a little differently. I am really grateful that I stepped out of my comfort zone.